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City and County of Honolulu - Refuse Division
Alas ... poor Cedrick, we knew him well - Billy Shakespeare
City and County of Honolulu Department of Environmental Services Refuse Division 1000 Uluohia Street Kapolei, HI 96707 Dear Refuse Department, Recently my beloved animal companion, "Cedrick" passed away quietly while running at top speed through the heavy traffic of Waialae-Kahala. Cedrick was my pet mongoose. He was coming up to his fourth birthday and we were planning a beach barbecue with a Party Bouncer for the strippers. I was going to make Tequila Sunrise's for the homeless guy under the banana stump. During this sad time of my life, I have taken time off from my unemployment and am trying to come to grips with this loss. I've folded up his swimming trunks and put his favorite cotton ball in the Goodwill box. (Cedrick, not the homeless guy.) I've canceled his e-mail account and his Macy's credit card, but I would feel a lot better if I could achieve some real closure. My problem is that I can't find his earthly remains. If I did, I would hire a 747 and have his ashes quietly scattered along Waikiki beach. Could you please write to me and let me know if you have found my little Cedrick? He was colored light brown and parted his hair on the left. He had two, tiny, beady eyes - the kind of eyes that would love you intensely from under the refridgerator. After being run over by a large truck, he is probably the size of a buttermilk pancake, like the kind you can order at Zippys. Sincerely, |
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